its 2:49 am

me: wat are u doing
yijin: reading thermodynamics.. work due tmr. u leh
me: cells short ans. sup work due tmr

minutes later..

hk: doing wat
me: cells sup work due tmr. u leh
hk: haha cells work due yesterday

welcome to our world.

the college i'm in provides accomodation in the main college builing, a few houses beside the college (adam road) and a few houses in this ulu part of cambridge- romsey terrace.
the first years will put their names in this box and the names get picked to form the room ballot list for the second year.
in the third year, the order is reversed.
so the person at the top of the ballot list in the second year is at the bottom in the third year.
and the third years choose the rooms first, and then the college removes a certain number of rooms for the incoming first years, then the second years choose their rooms.
so a person at the bottom of the ballot list for the second year is really at the bottom for the second year but right at the top for the third year.

the bottom 30 ppl in the list generally get thrown to romsey terrace.
cos there is no space in college, and most ppl don't want to go there.
so ppl at the top of the ballot generally don't choose to go there.
romsey terrace is lovely in its own right but its so far away from everyone and everything. for the cam ppl- its on mill road further away then cho mee. yes, its that bad.

and so the room ballot was drawn on sunday
and lo and behold!
i was right at the bottom of the list.
rock bottom.
bottom bottom.
i was shocked.
i really didn't want to go to romsey terrace!
cos its so disconnected from everyone else
and its at the other end of cam from the hill colleges so i prob have to change cg!

so i was devastated.
i mass emailed my cg to ask them to pray for me.
i went online and bugged ppl to pray for me.
i called my daddy and asked him to pray for me.

on monday i went on a tour to romsey terrace.
took us 45 mins to walk there from college.
the rooms were small.
the road leading to the place was dodgy.
there was no dryer in the kitchen, only a washing machine.
one toilet in the whole house.
it was a sad place.

on tuesday the current second years picked their rooms for the third year.
on wednesday, the current first years at the top of the list started to pick their rooms for the second year at abt 7pm.
my time slot was 920pm.
so of course by the time i got there almost all the rooms in college were taken by ppl higher in the ballot list.
10 ppl had to choose their rooms, and there were a few adam road houses left, a few romsey terrace rooms left and a single college room and a set college room.
and so they chose their rooms.
and somehow, miraculously, none of them picked the single college room left.

so i picked it.

then i went to see my fren's room, which is supposedly identical to the room i picked.
its a bit bigger than the one i have now.
and i share a bathroom with one person, just like the way i do it now.
i've got a garden view.
and the room is located on the same staircase as the ppl i'm closer to in college.
and is just opposite the plodge.

i'm just amazed.
and so is everyone else.
how on earth did i manage to get a room in college even though i'm right at the bottom of the list?!
turns out that some ppl at the top fancied romsey terrace a lot so they all took it.
but somehow
that one single room in college was just untouched.
as i stood around in the JCR waiting for my turn i heard ppl saying that they wanted to change to that room
and i was silently hoping that they wouldn't
and they didn't
and so i got that room.

and next year, the balloting order will be reversed
i'll be right at the very top of the list, second only to a few linguist 4th years.
i'll be able to choose practically any room i want for my third year.
and now i've got a pretty good room for my second year even though i'm right at the bottom.
its incredible.

God is incredible
and amazing.
when He said in Genesis 22:8 that He will provide, He really meant it.
thank you Lord.
for listening to the prayers of Your children
and for blessing me so richly
and for showing me that You have plans for me, to prosper me and not to harm me, to give me hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)
that You will not disappoint.
thank you for showing me (once again) that i need not worry about my future.
that faith placed in You is faith well placed.
that You know whats best for me.
thank You Lord.



"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? "And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, `What shall we eat?' or `What shall we drink?' or `What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Matthew 6:25-34

in a rather reflective mood all of a sudden.
maybe its cos i've jsut realised that i haven't web cammed my family for a few weeks.
i've spoken to them on the phone, yes.
but i haven't seen them.
i wonder how they are doing.

one of the things that pains me the most is the fact that i won't be able to watch my brothers grow up.

i want to be there to hear their first day of sec 4.
to give them help and support when they sit for their O levels.
i want to be there when they get home late from school, to hear how their day went.
i want to be there when they get back from school trips abroad.
i want to be there when they bring their exam papers back and share their joy or tears.
i want to be there when they make important decisions- which school to go to, which courses to take.
i want to be there when they get their first funky haircut
i want to be there when they dye their hair for the first time.
i want to be there when they celebrate their birthdays.
with birthdays in may and early june, i won't get to celebrate their birthdays with them till 2009. and then norman will be 19 and edmund will be 17.

i just realised that one brother will go to jc/poly next year.
and after hc nite, i've realised how recent an event that was for me.
zhang da le.
i want to be there on your first day of jc/poly.
to give u help and advice during that time of great change.


but i can't.
i'm sorry.
i'm sorry i can't be there for u all the time.
i'm sorry i can't be a good big sister.
i'm sorry i'm practically absent from your life now, while ur friends with older siblings have someone to look after them.
i love you both very very much.
and i miss u both very much too.
i regret not hugging u both more when i had the chance to.
can't wait to see u both again in july.
please take care of yourselves.

so the cambridge salsa competition was held this evening.
met with my partner like 20 mins before it started to practice a bit.
we were supposed to meet 1 hr earlier but we were both late and i had to put on make up blah blah so in the end we had 20 mins to practice.
the format of the competition was similar to notts.
they just played a short piece of music and we danced.
the problem is that my partner hardly ever social dances so i don't get to dance with him outside team practice sessions.
but he leads really well, he has style and he does fun stuff sometimes so its nice to dance with him.

so we danced in the first round, with 12 couples i think.
and we got through to the finals, with 6 couples.
and all 6 couples were from the salsa team :)
then the judges ranked the dancers, from the first to the sixth position.

then we waited for a long while
and discussed the music that was provided.
it wasn't good
the second song was slower than the first one, and the beat was strange too.
so i didn't manage to co-ordinate with my partner at the beginning. that was sad.
steph took videos of us dancing so we were watching the second dance on my camera while waiting for the results to be announced. we covered up our mistakes quite well i guess, so it wasn't too bad, only that i felt quite crap when we were dancing cos it was so off.

and then the results were announced
and we got third!
i'm v happy :)
do thank God for that.
i know its only cambridge competition and not an inter-university one, but still.
yay :)
to those who came down to watch- thanks! :)

and so i've succumbed to peer pressure and joined the world of facebook.
and already i can feel it's time-sapping powers - just wasted an hour on it!
for those of u who are as swa ku as i am, facebook is just another version of friendster- but its more elitist in that only ppl from certain universities can join. primarily US unis cos it started there.
its so helpful cos now i can learn the names of the ppl i see around in college.
can't remember the brits' names loh. bleh.

well then
now it time for an advert:
i'll be competing in the cuppers open salsa this sat, 18 feb
in the Parkside Gym
salsa open starts at 5:15pm
costs 1 pound to enter
so if u have time and spare change, do drop by and watch :) my category should end by 6 pm if all goes on schedule!

and as usual my dear partner has concluded that we will meet at 4 pm to practice.
whereas other couples have been practicing for weeks.
well then.
we'll just wait and see.

the french calendar declares "Saint-Valentin"
therefore happy valentine's day!
sainsbury's is selling roses at 20 quid a bouquet
*whistles*
went there with some cf guys last night and we unanimously agreed that 20 quid can be spent on more worthwhile things.
and the roses aren't that fantastic either- just wrapped in plastic!!
for that amt of money one can get a gigantic thing in s'pore i'm sure.
its just not v economical to buy roses in the dead of winter.

speaking of which
in december i was told "its not that cold now, it will get colder in jan and feb! and this year it snowed in march!"
so i was under the impression that "the worst is yet to be"
right up till saturday.
untill i went to london xiaoen said that "its getting warmer"
and i agreed.
then i said "i was told last year that it would be really cold in jan and feb.. so may be the cold season isn't here yet"
then she said "but it is feb now!"
then i realised
that winter is almost over and its now approaching spring.
and the days are getting longer cos the sun is setting later.
and all this while i've been thinking its still mid-winter.
goodness
how time flies.

so its was HC nite on saturday.
did a solo dance.
didn't make any mistakes, so thats good.
watched a video of myself dancing and i realised that i looked v cautious.
cos i was.
i didn't wanna fall flat on my face.
the floor was quite rubbish, with bits of paper stuck on to mark positions of stuff, dried chewing gum and random screws sticking out here and there.
so i had to be careful
and it showed
otherwise i guess it went ok.

it was nice seeing everyone again :)
food was normal.
comparable to formal hall but thrice the price.
we watched past orientation videos!
and saw little children in secondary sch uniform running around in hc.
and then we realised that that was us about this time just 3 years ago.
and now we are studying abroad. in university.
scary.
i enjoyed the song session at the end :)
that brought back memories of orientation, MAF and the day we collected our O level results (my class sat tgt in a classroom and sang hc songs...)
of venezia, 6th avenue, our class bench.
of the labs, LTs and canteen.
of the dance studio, audi and red carpet.
the memories are so vivid
and indeed they should be for they are quite recent.
its just amazing how much my life has changed in such a short period of time.
and then there was the mass dance.
doing mass dance in a nice dress and heels is an interesting experience.
quite fun.
just didn't like the sticky sweaty feeling after that.


hwa choo! thinking of you...


me, hx and michelle. didn't take a single photo with yj, yf and sheila! bleh. :(



went to xiaoen's church on sunday.
very modern service in a rather old building with beautiful stained glass.
interesting experience.
went to big sains, then went to someone's hall to cook.
can't remember the name of the hall :S
cooked and ate lunch.
during which i met all the s'porean triple E ppl in imperial
some of them were mugging at the table beside ours.
that reminded me of the amt of work i had waiting for me to complete, so it was quite annoying.
the ppl i had lunch with were fun though :)
its nice to hear them mention physics-related stuff and know that i don't need to understand.
then i told them "the cell membrane is a capacitor"
and they asked me wat an inductor was.
no idea man.
i only know that the cell membrane is a capacitor cos the notes say so.
that is the one thing i have decided not to question.
i can ponder over the action of auxin and cytokinin but i will not waste energy on the stoopid cell membrane and its capacitor tendencies.

but i digress
so as i was saying, i visited imperial collge


thats where i would probably have gone if cam didn't want me. looks like a nice place. and its so close to all the shopping areas!

went to london over the weekend.
primarily for hc nite.
will blog more abt that later.
i'm tired.
it was an expensive trip.
in terms of time and money.
transport cost a bomb, but i'm glad i invested in an oyster card (thanks for the advice :) )
didn't get much sleep there (cos i wanted to talk to xiaoen!)
we slept at 3am
then i slept at 2 am on sunday rushing QB supervision work due on monday.
and its 3:10 am now and i've just completed the end bits of my cells supervision work (he gave us 3 sets of work!! did some on friday and sunday but couldn't finish) and chem sup work due on tuesday.
so i'm really tired.
can't keep this up man.
first blackpool, then london.
argh.
but i'm glad i went to both.
it was nice to meet up with the london ppl.
i especially enjoyed dinner with xiaoen and rosanna on sunday.
that was fun :)
lunch was fun too. the only downside was fact that ppl were mugging close to where we were eating.. that was a bit annoying.
more abt that next time.
i'm so tired.

i overheard a chem supervisor explaining SN2 reactions to his students at the dept.
"so you shove in the hydroxide and the bromide drops off"
truly scientific terms indeed.

our new physio lecturer is eccentric.
the typical mad old prof.
really amusing to watch.
we had to stiffle our laughter sometimes cos of the comments he made.
but he is really generous.
his hypothesis was that since the millard reaction is reduced at low pH, salt and vinegar crisps would be of a lighter colour than salted crisps.
so in order to test his hypothesis, we gave each of us a bag of crisps!
and we were also supposed to observe that in each bag, there would be a few pieces of crisps with a darker centre, and that is where germination had begun to occur.
we were studying plant development.
so we just sat in the LT munching on crisps and watching him.
quite fun :)

went to the fez club after salsa practice yesterday.
went to the b bar with some of my team mates before that.
they told me: "b bar has a strict age limit- they don't allow under 21s. how old are u?"
the bunch of them who were going there were 20 plus... the youngest was 22.
so i said "i'm 20 this year"
they said "you're so young! its ok we'll try to sneak u in"
and they did
and i got in!
just sat in b bar for a bit waiting for an opportune time to go to the fez club.
anw, the point is that i'll be 20 this year!
that's scary :S
that's so old.
then i won't be a teenager anymore :S
the thought of being an adult is intimidating
eek.

well then
so it was international night at the fez club yesterday.
the flyer and email i got said that they would be playing "salsa, reggaeton, merengue, samba, RnB"
thats why we went
it started off quite well.
they played lots of salsa
so since there were 6 of us we could pair up and that was good.
then the music shifted to merengue.
very slow constipated merengue
but still passable.
then they switched to reggaeton.
that wasn't too bad- cos they played one of my fav songs - gasolina! :)
then they played clubbing pop songs, eg my humps.
that was ok
and then they started on RnB
and they forgot that they were supposed to be playing other songs as well.
so they just continued RnB for dunno how long.
and since i was with my team mates and i didn't know them too well and they were rather mature, RnB wasn't that fun.
so i went home.

in conclusion, i haven't clubbed properly this term yet.
the regular clubbing, not salsa clubbing.
kind of miss it a bit.
cos its quite fun- don't really need to think too much.
salsa can get quite stressful sometimes cos i need to think of how to follow and style.
well then.
so today is the start of the 4th week of this term.
and 4 weeks later it'll be our easter hols.
does time fly or does time fly.
scary~

had my first plant physio supervision today.
it lasted for 1.5 hours, half an hour extra
but my supervision partner and i didn't mind cos we were really enjoying ourselves.
for one the supervisior is cute, which is an improvement over our previous supervisor who had the typical wise mature look (ie old)
for another we had supervision in the grad cafe, which is on the third floor (thats very high up by cam standards!) of this building which overlooks the river. and there were floor to ceiling windows so the view was fantastic.
and we had free tea and coffee (!)
and our supervisior brought 3 types of biscuits to share with us (!!)
and we lounged on sofas for our supervision.
so it was great fun :)
even though we -were- discussing circadian rhythms in plants. and photosystem II.
bleh.

just got back from the Brit salsafest
went with some ppl from the team.
left on fri afternoon, reached cam at abt noon on monday.
slept an average of 4.5 hours on fri, sat and sun night.
danced from 11pm-2am on fri night.
schedule for sat and sun:
workshops from from 10 am-noon
lunch
workshops from 1-5pm
dinner
watched performance by professional ppl from 10- 1130 pm
social danced from 1130pm-3 am.

therefore i'm tired.
practically sleepwalked through the last workshop on sunday.
felt a bit lost during the social dancing sometimes.
missed having justin and yq around to give advice.
the songs that they play at xen were played during the salsafest as well, and that made me miss xen even more.
:(

on the whole the salsafest was amazing.
a bit star-struck
went for workshops by susana montero, supermario, neeraj maskara & ania and iris de brito and of course edie the salsa freak.
and other ppl i can't remember.
the body movement class by iris was scary. it was so incredibly difficult! at least for me.
"move ur feet. now move your torso. use your shoulders. now add the hands. now add the hips."
whoa.
i couldn't even co-ordinate the first 2 loh.
its that difficult!!
it was fantastic watching her dance though- she is brilliant.
finally got to see edie life.
that was something.
went for her spinning workshop.
it was so popular that there wasn't much room to spin.


well then
so the salsafest was held in Blackpool.
which is the home of international ballroom championships.
got to dance in the ballroom they use for competitions.
was apparently built in the 19th century- sth like that.
so its really grand.


ballroom!


some of the ppl on the team. taken after the performance we watched on the last night



and i met Harry at the salsafest
*yay*
so nice to see and dance with a fellow xenbar person again :)


harry and i! in the spanish hall in Winter Gardens. winter gardens is this huge complex with lots of elaborate rooms and a massive ballroom, and its where the salsafest was held. thats a photo of us after supermario's class!

had physio prac today.
we did ECGs
now i have an ECG of my heart :)
we connected leads from our wrists to this mysterious black box which led to the computer.
according to the physio dept prof, this is necessary because:
it is unsafe to connect ourselves directly to the computer...
because if any of us gets a heart attack in the middle of the practical, the resulting voltage sent to the computer might cause it to break down.
so we have to connect ourselves to the black box (some adapter thing), which then leads to the computer- all that to protect the computer.
yup the physio dept really cares for its students :)