Dear Amazon seller who sent us a broken iPad for Christmas

Dear Amazon seller who sent my 8-year-old daughter an iPad 2 for Christmas...

I'm quite sure you knew when you wrapped this iPad in a nearly pristine box that it wouldn't be what we were expecting. After all, the ad on Amazon did state, "Acceptable Condition." (And surely this iPad is quite acceptable... to those who prefer to give their children presents that have been run over by a truck.)

 It is clear from the condition of the box that this damage did not happen during shipping as none of the broken and missing pieces from the face of the iPad are in the box and the dents in the back don't have corresponding dents on the back of the box.That is good news because we wouldn't want to unfairly blame USPS this crazy time of year. Those folks are working really hard these days!

You know? At first I was really mad! You see, my daughter's grandparents wanted to get her a gently-used iPad for Christmas because they know that Mom and Dad can't afford anything like that. My 8-year-old daughter was born weighing only 2 lbs 7 oz and has Down syndrome. She is home-bound now because she has chronic pneumonia. Every little cold ends up in her lungs and she is hospitalized an average of once a year... sometimes it's more. So sadly the petri dish we call "school" is out of the question for now.

We were looking forward to loading educational apps on her new-to-her iPad to keep her busy while she is home.

Yes - the Mamma Bear came out when I opened the box. Steam came out of my ears, my eyes bulged a bit and I may have even spewed profanity in my head.

But then I took a really deep breath.
(OK - like maybe it was closer to hyperventilation...)
I slowed down and I thought about it.

Who would do such a thing? It looks like you found this in a garbage can and figured you could make a quick buck.

Who would do this?

But why should I be so quick to judge? I'm sorry my initial reaction was to judge you even though I know nothing about you.

At first I thought perhaps you might be someone living in poverty, searching for a way to afford Christmas gifts for your own kids... but I Googled the return address, and assuming you gave the correct return address, I found this street view of your home:

I know that just because the outside looks nice doesn't mean there isn't turmoil on the inside. Perhaps you are faced with losing your own home. Times are tough. It's scary out there!

We understand! We used to live in a similar home outside of Dallas, TX. We lost our house almost 8 years ago to my daughter's medical bills. We moved in with my parents in VA for a while and then rented for a number of years until we could start patching our credit back together.

And you know what? We LOVE Virginia! Losing a home seems terrible at the time, but for us it had a silver lining. Just last spring we were finally able to buy a new place. It's not much now, but someday we want to replace the 1973 single wide with a real house.

 (It's had some add-ons. The way I figure it, if we just keep adding, we'll have a double-wide really soon!)

Perhaps you have been faced with the loss of a job and are scraping by just to feed your family.

We understand! My husband lost his job in August. It's been really tight and we're trying hard not to lose our current home. We feel blessed that my husband recently got a new job. It's part time and it isn't much above minimum wage, but it's something, right? Others are less fortunate.

And you know what? We have found the silver lining! After my husband lost his job, I rediscovered my love for art after more than 20 years! I posted some of my art on-line and I have been working my right hand off ever since - 12+ hours a day... and now the American Poultry Association is interested in making me one of their official illustrators! Can you believe it??

Art doesn't pay a lot and I'll have to do a lot more work before we're making ends meet, but I can't tell you how excited I am!

So what am I going to say to you?

I'm going to say, "Hang in there!

I don't know what you might be going through or what your needs are that you felt you had to take someone's money for this iPad... but what ever it is, please know it's going to get better.

While all the other affordable used iPads that were on Amazon seem to have sold by now, that's OK too. My kids will never be the wiser. My 11-year-old asked for shoes because she says hers are "a bit pinchy" and we'll be giving the younger one the iPad 1 that we were going to give the 11-year-old. It will all work out just fine!

And please - have a Very Merry Christmas!
Love and best wishes from my family to yours!

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

UPDATE!!!

WOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!!!

The folks from Amazon just called me! They read my blog post and were very disappointed with the condition the iPad arrived in.
They will be reimbursing my mother in full and are sending The Skink a Kindle Fire HD Kids Edition!!

I was already a big fan of Amazon, but I'm a fan for life now!

I'm blown away! 

Thank you, Amazon.com!!!

*~*~*~*

How to Stage Your Home for Living - Reality Edition!

This poor blog has not seen a lot of activity in a long time. I've been putting more time and attention into my chicken blog, Natural Chicken Keeping, because as hectic and stressful as life can be with two kids with special needs, chickens have become my at-home escape.

But today was one of those days that I ran across another blog post that was simply so preposterous, it needed to be addressed... with mom humor.

How to Stage Your Home for Living (Link)

Oh yes! This is a WONDERFUL idea for the average family...

with no kids...

a few million extra dollars...

and a maid or 3.

For the rest of this, this post is simply another buzzing load of hogwash put out there to make us feel inadequate and lazy.


I feel it is my duty as a realist with kids, dogs, cats, chickens (and hopefully soon goats and horses... and maybe a cow...) to dispel any delusions the above mentioned article may have instilled into the minds of other innocent, overworked, over-stressed parents like myself.


And now fo:

How to Stage Your Home for Living - Reality Edition!

Housekeeping for the rest of us

Never throw anything away or sell anything!
Inevitably  if you do, your child with sensory issues will be scarred for life! Those 237 cheesy McDonald's toys that you step on every time you walk through the house barefoot?
NO!
The empty box with the Hello Kitty or Batman picture on the front?
Don't you dare!
The almost-empty knock-off perfume on your teen's dresser?
Forget about it!
Because if you do, you will have disposed of the most precious thing that your child ever had... FOREVER!
The crying, pouting and misery could last for weeks!

Find a home for everything!
Yes - everything you have has a place... in your house... somewhere. If you simply can't fit another item in your closet or on your dresser, then try the space under your bed, the floor, the window ledges, the stairs, the entertainment center or your front porch. All of these areas are yours and can be used to keep your stuff.

Counter tops, cupboards and drawers
These are the special places you may use to put the objects you don't want your kids to reach or find. That's right!
Grandma's crystal angel figurine?
I suggest putting that at the back of your coffee mug cupboard. You should keep breakable things together!
Those farm boots that your youngest loves to put on and tromp about the house wearing, leaving a trail of farm fresh poop-laden mud behind?
Definitely put those on the kitchen counter where they'll be safe!
Purses, wallets, vibrators and wedding rings that might lose a rock if you wear them out to clean the chicken coop?
All of the above belong in your underwear drawer... (might I suggest putting locks on your dresser drawers?)

Personalize your decor
Yes - absolutely! All of the hand and face prints on your windows should be those of your own children! The muddy footprints across your carpets will remind all your visitors of just how big your teenage son is getting and will warn potential burgles that a very large dog is lurking... somewhere.
The giant red scrape across the white paint on your living room wall will bring back nostalgic memories of your child's Flying Firetruck game. Ahhhh! Good times!

Give your bathroom the attention it deserves
The best way to determine what your bathroom needs is to go sit down... with a book... for a minimum of 15 minutes. (These things can't be rushed!)
Bingo! You've figured it out!
Your bathroom is definitely in need of some new air deodorizer spray!
(Wow - that was easy!)

As for your kids bathroom, all you need is a rake and a hose. (You're welcome.)

Consider curb appeal
The presence of chickens pecking through your sun-parched herb garden will bring joy and happiness to all passer-bys. Toss in a few overturned bicycles, wagons and naked Barbie dolls and the motif will be almost complete! All that is missing is a large dog or two to add a harmonious and joyful noise. Now you have addressed all of the senses and created a homy feel that will insure that the neighborhood kids visit regularly.

Clean thoroughly
Right before your yearly cook out!
Make sure all your lawn chairs are upright and hose off your back deck. Mowing is always wise for this occasion and at least make sure your guests can locate the toilet under the large pile of dirty towels... or provide directions to the nearest gas station for your guests' comfort.

Complete minor repairs
Three words; Duct tape, zip ties, WD-40
(Again, you're welcome.)

Major Repairs
- If you can't do it yourself, just tow your tractor to someone who can or call Daryl.
- Your chicken's broken leg will heal eventually.
- Place your garden near that leaking pipe to ensure proper watering.
- Pallets can be used to patch broken fencing.
- Duct tape.
- Zip ties.
- WD-40

And I hope you may now enjoy happy living as an average human on planet earth!

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